soulcard reading with sandy

T.H. White
Perhaps we all give the best of our hearts uncritically…to those who hardly think about us in return.

Just this month, I had a session with a soulcard reader. Her name is Sandy. Many have been attending reading sessions with her considering her popularity on magazines. She first instructed me to divide the cards then revealed things she could read from some abstract photos that represent my current condition. There were words that hit me hard.

I’m smart but very cynical, very negative. Pain will always play its part in my daily struggle. I have to be strong, use my willpower to battle against the world. I would always hold back my strength from powers that threaten to submerge, trap me, that I'll never feel whole again. She asked me so many questions. I asked her too.

She told me to scream every morning if I have to. The kept feelings of resentment and anguish appear dormant as I adjust to the presence of some people in my life; one thought that fills me with so much terror. When pressure flares up, I should act on it, either to win or to resurrect from the horrible ache it could provide me, without any intention of leaving me alone.

The world of ideas is the thing that matters to me. Every person I loved had been in love with this same muse. We may have been into so many arguments, but intimacy for me requires someone I can talk with. Everything else is secondary. Looks, money, name it… they’re all minor. I’m less of a person when I’m abandoned, with concealed emotions.

We talked about love. She held a card again and said, “I admire your principles in life. Too serious for 18.” We moved on to discussing about relationships. I want other people to feel love as much as I do. Sometimes, it gets to the point that they’re about to enter the realm of accepting certain things, but later on, they would hesitate. Sandy knew one thing that I’ve kept private. Those cards made it easier for her to recognize something confidential. I tried avoiding her succeeding questions. But I’d like to think that all my life, I’ve been brutally honest. I can’t help but to put my complete trust on her.

There is so much power in self-destruction though I haven’t done it. I give respect to myself. Sandy made me realize some things. Don’t let my weakness possess my life. Let love alone rule. If I truly feel the power of love, I need not stab my eyes from the truth. Embrace it. I don’t want to hurt any person. I don’t want to be hurt either.

Paradigms do change and when they’re taking place, it’s hard to concentrate on things. For me, my paradigms reflect personal judgment on reality. Change occurs when I realize the other side of things. Distance takes place and then I begin to see where things have been troubled and do something about it.

Off the topic: I had tarot card reading last week at Powerplant. I’ll share about it next time. ;)